What’s More Convenient: Elimination Communication or Full-time Diapering?

Elimination Communication is often seen as inconvenient. It’s different. Unknown. Mysterious. Potentially…{gasp}…dirty.

The Truth

Let me debunk this myth clearly and calmly: pottying your baby (when started and practiced properly) is actually less messy and takes less time than dealing with diaper changes.

It causes less struggle throughout the day (um, yeah, most babies *hate* laying down for the old diaper change, don’t they?).

And then later on, when other kiddos are engaged in months (and even years) of conventional toilet training, while your kiddo regularly goes potty on the…well…potty…you probably won’t be sitting there hemming & hawing about how Elimination Communication was inconvenient.

Elimination Communication Does Take Effort

Yes, EC takes a bit of up-front effort to get started. Yes, you need to sit down and learn EC. But it’s kinda like any good investment: you put in effort and energy up-front and you get a huge payoff later on.

That is, if you start in the right way. Go get some free info off the internet and try to wing and write me in 12 months with an update. I get these all the time. “I don’t know where I screwed up.” “It doesn’t work anymore!” “We gave up.” Elimination Communication can totally backfire.

So, if you’ve winged it, or you have a friend who has winged it, I take it all back. In this light, yeah…EC IS inconvenient.

Potty Learning Is Inconvenient, No Matter the Age

And let’s get back to a real basic concept here (one that may come as a shock):
Potty learning, no matter what age you begin, is just plain inconvenient.

In our society, we ALL want convenience, short-cuts, best practices, tips, tricks, and to plain avoid the hard stuff. (I do!)

We don’t want to deal with poop (I don’t!). We don’t want to get peed on (nope!).

Whether you start at birth, 12 months, or 36 months…you have to deal with poop and pee. Period.

Disposable Diapers Are Convenient…but…

Disposable diapers were invented so mothers didn’t have to stay at home and wash laundry all day long. It was part of the feminist movement.

They are indeed very convenient yet are proven to delay potty training. (Especially these wonder diapers that can be worn for up to 12 hours!!!!!)

Take away the feeling of wetness, erase the instincts that encourage the baby to resist sitting in his pee or feces, and hush the communication about it…and your baby will comply.

She will learn that her potty is her pants. When you decide that her potty shouldn’t be her pants any longer, she just might get confused.

Then…the convenience…magically…disappears….

Babies: Not the Most Convenient Crowd of Humans

Birthing a baby. Taking care of a baby’s needs. Feeding. Helping to sleep. Consoling. Building trust. Communicating. Getting them to do what we want. (ha) Dealing with spit-up, poo, pee, messy eating, messy house, mess mess mess.

Babies are not convenient, are they?

But we try to make them convenient.

Put them in a crib, stick a pacifier in their mouth, feed them this formula to save your boobs and get them on a schedule, let them cry it out, stick a diaper on them for at least 3 years til they say “I want to go in the potty now, Mom.”

Not throwing judgments here. We all do what we can. Balance.

But, the reality is that in our society, we make it a habit of making things convenient. We just do.

Constantly feeding a newborn is inconvenient, too, but every baby needs feeding. Being a responsive parent is certainly not always convenient, but it reaps the highest rewards. Helping a baby take a nap is inconvenient, but we do it or we’d all go insane.

Some Tricks to Doing EC “Conveniently”

Here are some things that can help you do Elimination Communication with balance, convenience, and sanity intact!

• do it as often as you can. Part-time? Once a day? Poops only? Weekends only? Full-time? Sure, whatever YOU can!
• do it with a diaper “back-up.” A diaper-free baby can still wear diapers. The difference is that he’s not dependent upon diapers. Many parents (myself included) use diapers “just in case.” But we’re not married to them.
• learn how to do it right, from the beginning. Please do not wing it. I’m not exaggerating. Learn why here.
• be present with your baby, connected, (while not hyper-focusing on your baby, or on EC) and EC will flow smoothly. Conduct your life in a busy, distracted manner and it probably won’t work. In fact, most things about parenting will likely crumble in your wake.
• get support.

The Key to Balancing Convenience & Care

Slowing down around life is key in our bustling society…and realizing that nothing about pottying (or having) a baby is convenient. With pottying, it’s just a matter of when you choose to begin. With babies, it’s just a matter of staying present and providing what the baby can’t provide for himself.

Elimination Communication could very well seem less “convenient” in the beginning months and years…but it results in more convenience earlier than conventional potty training.

And more connection. And more trust. And more hygiene. And more clarity.

If your baby is 0-20 months, start EC today.

If your child is 20-30 months, start non-coercive 3 day potty training today with my Mama friend Jamie.

I’m wondering…How do you balance convenience and care? Please reply below!

Looking forward to hearing your input!

Warm hugs,

Andrea

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